A Leauki's Writings
found in rec.humor.jewish
Published on December 27, 2005 By Leauki In Humor
A guy in Paris saw a pit bull attacking a toddler. He killed the pit bull and saved the child's life.

Reporters swarmed the fellow.

"Tell us! What's your name? All Paris will love you! Tomorrow's headline will be:  "Hero Saves Girl from Vicious Dog!"

The guy says, "But I'm not from Paris.

"Reporters: "That's OK. Then the whole of France will love you and tomorrow's headline will read: 'Hero Saves Girl from Vicious Dog!'"

The guy says, "I'm not from France, either."

Reporters: "That's OK also. All Europe will love you. Tomorrow's headlines will shout: 'Hero Saves Girl from Vicious Dog!'"

The guy says, "I'm not from Europe, either.

"Reporters: "So, where ARE you from?

The guy says, "I'm from Israel.

"Reporters: "OK. Then tomorrow's headlines will proclaim to the world:
  
'Israeli Kills Girl's Dog!'"

Comments
on Dec 27, 2005
While a great one, I heard it first (and then many other times) as "Damn Yankee kills pet dog!" when the Guy says he is from boston (and it happened in charleston). Pick your enemies!  I have even heard a version of "damn Tar Heel" as us Genteel Virginians are not so gauche as those black foot barbarians!
on Dec 28, 2005
"Damn Yankee kills pet dog!"


reminds me of an experience my nephew had when his car broke down in Alabama...
first, I must say that he wears a Jewish scullcap on his head.... so keep that in mind..
He knocked on the door of the first home he came to... he asked the lady if he could use her phone.....
She just stood there repeating about ten times...."OMG you're a...
OMG you're a... ... ... ... ... "
He was expecting to be called some derogitory Jewish term.... but instead.... she finally finished her sentence....
"OMG.... You're a YANKEE"!

Years later we still laugh about that.
on Dec 28, 2005

He was expecting to be called some derogitory Jewish term.... but instead.... she finally finished her sentence....
"OMG.... You're a YANKEE"!


Maybe she wanted to say something else and changed it to Yankee before she said it.

But if she genuinely dislikes Yankees (defined by location) as opposed to certain ethnic groups or religion (defined by ancestry and upbringing), more power to her!

Reminds me of the Jewish joke about the Jewish boy who wanted to marry another boy. His mother was very sad about that.

The other boy was not Jewish!
on Dec 28, 2005
The other boy was not Jewish!


lol... what a coincidence... I just had lunch with a visiting friend from the States... he told me the following joke...

There was a little girl who came home from school one day and told her mother that she wanted to marry Mary. Mother ignored this...
This continued throughout the childs school years.... she would tell her mom every chance she had that she was going to marry Mary... it was ignored every time.
Finally, the girl graduated from high school and told her mother that she was a young adult now and she was getting married to Mary.
The mother very calmly said..."No you are not! Mary isn't Jewish!"